The Writers in Residence

Wishing You All a Wonderful Holiday Season!

CHRISTMAS CANDLE

a Poem by Kay Hoffman

Light a Christmas candle

And let it warmly glow

From out a friendly window

Across new-fallen snow.

Someone lone in passing

Will catch the strong bright beam

To cheer the rugged path ahead

And set the heart to dream.

Let the warm glad light shine

From your own candle’s ray

Glow deep within your loving heart

On each and every day.

Light a Christmas candle

To glow within your heart

And touch the life of someone dear

With blessings to impart.

Thank you for reading The Writers In Residence in 2023.

We will be back with new content on Wednesday, January 3, 2024.

Jackie

Gayle

Linda

Miko

Madeline

Jill

Hannah

Maggie

Rosemary

When A Series SPINS OFF: the Maisie Frobisher Mysteries

A Guest Post by Liz Hedgecock

I didn’t so much decide to write the Maisie Frobisher books. It was more that Maisie Frobisher decided she ought to have her own series!

Let me explain.

The Maisie Frobisher books are actually a spinoff series: the series they sprang from is the Caster and Fleet Mysteries. I co-wrote Caster and Fleet with another writer who is now a good friend, Paula Harmon.

When we began writing the books, Paula and I hadn’t actually met in real life – only via a Facebook writing group. We were already online friends, we liked each other’s writing styles, and we both wrote historical mystery (among other things). We’re not sure who first suggested writing a book together, but we’re very glad they did!

Maisie is a very minor character in the Caster and Fleet world until she has more of a starring role in book 4, The Case of the Masquerade Mob, which is a romp involving masked balls and all sorts of skulduggery. At the end of the book, poor Maisie, who has had rather a rough time, decides to travel the world and forget about men for a while. That was my jumping-off point, because I’d grown to like Maisie very much and I didn’t want to let her go.

My friend Paula also has a spinoff series of her own, set in the run-up to World War I, which follows the younger sister of one of our protagonists, Margaret Demeray.

I had many reasons to set the Maisie series abroad. Firstly, at the end of Masquerade Mob Maisie was going travelling, and I couldn’t go back on that! Secondly, in the 1890s, when the series is set, the world was opening up. Bigger and more luxurious cruise ships, faster journeys, and more capacity to travel for pleasure. I chose India because it was a well-known destination, the route was interesting, and also because of the opportunity to look at the British in India in the time of the Raj.

I try not to get too bogged down in historical research, though there are all sorts of opportunities to get lost down research rabbit holes! One advantage is that I have a Master’s degree in Victorian literature, so I’m fairly well grounded in some aspects. While I want to make the stories accurate, I don’t want to spoil a story for the sake of including every historical fact I’ve discovered. Probably a tenth of the things I’ve read about make it into the final book.

I didn’t choose the late Victorian period just because I knew a bit about it, though. It’s also fascinating because of what was going on at the time. Women were fighting for their rights, the ‘New Woman’ had arrived, and inventions like the safety bicycle meant that women’s mobility could increase.

The Maisie books are also special to me because they mark a change in the way I write. Up to that point, I had always written at my computer. With Maisie, I had the urge to try something different. In the first book in the series, All at Sea, Maisie is on a ship which is always moving, and she must solve the mystery before the ship reaches port. With that sense of urgency in mind, I tried an experiment. I took my phone for a walk and dictated the book’s opening: a letter from Maisie to her mother, followed by a rather different diary entry on the same subject. The words seemed to flow. Ever since then, I’ve dictated my fiction rather than writing it. The result needs correction and editing, of course, but it’s a really good way to get into the flow, get that first draft down, and spend time walking rather than sitting.

If you do try the first Maisie book, All at Sea, or indeed, the first in the Caster and Fleet series, The Case of the Black Tulips, I hope you enjoy them!

Liz Hedgecock grew up in London, England, did an English degree, and then took forever to start writing. Now Liz travels between the nineteenth and twenty-first centuries, murdering people. To be fair, she does usually clean up after herself.

Liz lives in Cheshire with her husband and two sons, and when she’s not writing you can usually find her reading, on a walk, messing about on social media or cooing over stuff in museums and art galleries. That’s her story, anyway, and she’s sticking to it.

Website: http://lizhedgecock.wordpress.com

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/LizHedgecockWrites

Twitter: http://twitter.com/lizhedgecock

Amazon author page (global link): http://author.to/LizH

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Note from Jackie Houchin: I began the Maisie Frobisher series – All at Sea – while on a cruise. (I could so identify with Maisie!) But I got so attached to her sense of adventure and fearless deeds of daring, that I bought the second one (Off The Map). Of course I had to buy that third book with the magnificent Leopard on the cover (Gone to Ground). I’m now reading the fourth one and Maisie is back in London, but still involved in mystery and intrigue. (In Plain Sight)

A character from the Maisie books appears in one of the four Christmas short stories in Liz Hedgecock’s Christmas Presence, Four Festive Stories. It’s a perfect way to sample Liz’s work and to gift for the Holidays!

This article was posted by member, Jackie Houchin

My First Santa

by Gayle Bartos-Pool

Most people who know me know I love Santa Claus. I have a rather large collection of Santas. About 3000 of them. Some are Christmas cards, old and newer ones, vintage Santa stickers, and assorted paper Santas, but two-thirds are figures, large and small. My basement now houses a good selection of these treasures, set out all year.

(The Santa with the striped gloves was the first. The others are some I made through the years.)

When my dad was stationed in France when I was in my teens, we went to Germany and I got my first Santa. That was 1963-66. Later, when I had moved to California and started working for a miniature store that sold dollhouses, the owner also had a room dedicated to holiday decorations. She had it open for Easter, Halloween, and especially Christmas. Since I could buy things wholesale, I did just that and added to my growing collection. We would also go to the Rose Bowl Swap Meet in Pasadena every month and I could get small Santas for $.50 to a few dollars. That was great for my limited budget.

My collection started to grow. I saw some really nice Santas and other holiday decorations in magazines. These were for Halloween, Easter, as well as Christmas. Now, I couldn’t afford most of these cool items, but I could make my own version. And I did. This added to my growing holiday decorations collection.

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This is one of the Santas I made. Jackie Houchin mentioned that most of the ones I crafted had a bald head just like Richard, my beloved husband. Maybe that’s why I did them that way.

(These I made after seeing ones like them in magazines. Hey, I’m on a budget.)

After a while I had a revelation. I actually had an older Santa than the one we got in Germany. That was my dad. He was born on December 6, 1917. That is St. Nicholas Day. So, my dad was my first Santa. To commemorate that event, I made a figure of my dad in a Santa suit. It makes me smile every time I see it amongst the other Santas that I crafted.

Santa Dad (11)

Santa Dad 27

But my dad being born on St. Nicholas Day doesn’t end there. You see, my dad gave me so much, just like Santa does for kids and us kids at heart. First, he gave me life along with my wonderful mom. That’s just about the greatest gift of all if you think about it. He provided me with a great education and I don’t mean just college. He was there to teach me how to fix things around the house if they got broken. He built a den onto our first house in Memphis with his own hands. I might not have built a house, a large one, but I sure built my share of dollhouses. I even designed and built one from scratch, not from a kit. Just knowing my dad had that skill made me believe I could do the same thing.

When I left their home in Memphis when I was twenty-four and moved to California, my mom was worried about me heading off to this new place, but my dad said that they had raised me well and that I would do just fine. I heard him say that. And by golly, I did manage to make a life for myself in the wilds of Southern California. His faith in me kept me strong.

Dad gave me another gift, the “git ’er done” attitude. If something needed to be done, he always found a way to do it. He was a pilot in the Air Force and many times he did the impossible because something had to be done. I have maintained that attitude in my business and well as personal life. Dad was a great role model.

So when I think of Santa Claus doing nice things for kids and grownups alike, I think of my dad. He was my first Santa and on December 6^th I think of him and St. Nicholas. Thanks, Dad, for helping to make me who I am. Being that role model was the greatest gift you could have ever given me. I love you. Happy Birthday.

Dad's Passport Pic Dad and me

(Dad’s passport photo and one with Dad and me when he took me to work one day way before it was done as a regular thing.)

Writing Humor

by Jackie Houchin

How do you make a story funny?

Do you have to be a comedian? If you can’t make it laugh-out-loud-able, how do you make it chuckle-able, or at least grin-able? Or at the VERY least, smirk-able?

Our own Gayle Bartos Pool does it with punny words, double entendre, dialects, and snappy, sometimes tongue-in-cheek dialogue. And… hysterical situations!

You will grin and you will laugh aloud when you read her short story, “Only in Hollywood” in the Sisters-in-Crime collection, LAndmarked for Murder. I mean, can you picture a bunch of thugs pushing a dressed up dead body around in a wheel chair in the Bonaventure Hotel in Hollywood? No Way!

Gayle’s “Glitzville” in her own short story collection From Light to Dark has some hilarious dialogue scenes. They may not be as tangled as Abbott and Costello’s “Who’s on first?” but they sure come close. The back-and-forth conversation between Archie Wright and Sal Cohn is definitely grin-able. Your eyes will dance down the pages as you read it.

Here’s the opening paragraph so you can “taste” the style, before the funny dialogue begins.

“Archie Wright’s the name. Dishing dirt’s the game. My sandbox: Hollywood. The most glamorous and glitzy, vicious, and venomous playground in the world. If you come for a visit, bring your sunscreen and your shark repellant. If you come to stay, let me warn you, Tinsel Town eats up and spits out a hundred just like you every day. Sometimes it isn’t pretty, but it’s my job to chronicle the ebb and flow of the hopeful, the helpless, and the hapless. My best stories come from the dark side of Glitzville.”

And then the whip smart fun begins….

These are two stories in books you can try out for examples of how write comedic. Perhaps you can recommend others?

If you are an author, how do YOU make scenes funny in your books? Is it by the characters, or some ridiculous premise, or by snappy, punny words and dialogue? (SHARE YOUR SECRETS!)

Okay, as a journalist and book reviewer, I don’t have much talent with humor aside from a pun now and then. So, for the end of this post, I will try to get you to laugh, chuckle, guffaw, grin, or maybe just smirk with a few corny jokes. (from Woman’s Day magazine)

What do you call a snake wearing a hard hat?
A boa constructor.

What do you get when you cross a centipede with a parrot?
A walkie talkie.

How do you make an octopus laugh?
With ten-tickles.

How do you get a country girl’s attention?
A-tractor.

What do you call a beehive without an exit?
Unbelievable.

(You can pause here and come back later if you are grinned out.)

What do you call someone with no body and no nose?
Nobody Knows.

What do you call a blind dinosaur?
A do-you-think-he-saw-us.

Where do pirates get their hooks?
Second hand stores.

What do you call black birds that stick together?
Vel-crows.

(And a few to whet your appetite.)

What do scholars eat when they’re hungry?
Academia nuts.

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
If they flew over the bay, they’d be called bagels.

Why should you never use “beef stew” as a password?
It’s not stroganoff.

What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop.

(And for our own, Linda Johnston…)

What do lawyers wear to court?
Lawsuits.

What do you call a priest who becomes a lawyer?
A father-in-law.

What’s a lawyer’s favorite drink?
Subpoena colada.

I hope you got some ideas, or at least some laughs.

Remember the Bible verse – “A merry heart does good like medicine.” – Proverbs 17:22.

If you can’t find where to comment, click the title of this post at the top (Writing Humor) and you should find Likes & Comments below.

Sadly, the COMMENTS BUTTON seems to be missing. We are working on it with a PC man. Please be patient and keep reading The Writers In Residence every Wednesday!

Podcasts for Writers and Readers

I’ve never been a news hound, but felt a need to keep abreast of what was going on, locally and globally. For the most part, I watched the news while walking nowhere (treadmill). But a couple of months ago, I said “enough” and went on a news fast. I’ve been on many such fasts through the years, but this one’s lasting longer—all because I discovered podcasts!

Even though I’ve been a guest on a few podcasts, I rarely listened to them. They can run quite long, up to an hour and more. But many are much shorter, and I now listen to the long ones in segments.

A few of my favorites:

Sisters in Crime. Many of you belong to SinC and Executive Director Julie Hennrikus produces weekly interviews featuring author members discussing their writing journeys. She kicks off each podcast with the question: “When did you first know you wanted to be a writer?”

Readers get to know more about their favorite authors and discover new ones. View the list of episodes here.

The following three podcasts are educational and offer information, tips, and advice on many writing-related topics, including craft, publishing, marketing, promotion, and social media. The podcast hosts interview writers, editors, and industry experts. Some hosts present the material themselves. Many of the podcasts are accompanied by transcripts.

The Writing and Marketing Show with Wendy H. Jones. Wendy is a Scottish crime writer. In 2022, she visited my Sisters in Crime chapter with a virtual presentation, “Storytelling in Marketing.”

I get that kid-in-a-candy-store feeling when I scroll through Wendy’s long list of podcasts. In “Using AI In Your Writing and Author Business” she presents both sides of the AI controversy. I have my own thoughts and preconceived notions about AI, but I like to make informed decisions, so appreciated her sharing.

Wendy’s podcasts on TikTok are interesting, but I’m NOT embracing that platform. While it’s no longer limited to the young (at least not for writers using BookTok), I don’t see myself producing videos on a regular basis. Still I appreciated Wendy providing information that allowed me to make another informed decision.

Wendy’s many episodes on craft include “Mastering the Art of Crime Story Writing,” “Writing Romantic Suspense,” “Writing for Children,” and “Using Your Own Life Story in Fiction”. View the list of episodes here.

Indy Author Podcast is the brainchild of Matty Dalrymple. As the “Indy” name suggests, this podcast focuses on self-published authors, but the traditionally published can certainly benefit from Matty’s many current and archived episodes.

I had read about auto-narrated audiobooks created by Google Play Books and wondered if I could produce two of my novels as audiobooks without spending thousands. I listened to Matty describe her process in turning out an audiobook for a non-fiction book she had written. It sounds quite challenging—and may be fine for non-fiction, but the monotone doesn’t suit fiction with its variety of voices and accents. Just imagining how my dialogue in the redneck bar scene in Murder at the Moonshine Inn would sound makes me shudder.

Again, a podcast gave me the information I needed to make another—you guessed it—informed decision. View the list of episodes here.

The Creative Penn is produced by Joanna Penn. She spends time at the beginning of each podcast with updates on the publishing industry as well as on her personal news. I’m currently listening to guest Douglas Smith, a Canadian author of speculative fiction who has much knowledge of publishing rights as well as how to sell our work to foreign markets. Where has Mr. Smith been all my writing life! View the list of episodes here.

Mysteryrat’s Maze Podcast, brought to listeners by Kings River Life Magazine, caters to readers. Each episode features a local actor (Fresno, CA) reading a short story or first chapter of a novel. View the list of episodes here.

Recently I learned of these two podcasts, but haven’t listened yet:

Alliance of Independent Authors
View the list of episodes here.

Novel Marketing Podcast
View the list of episodes here.

So I’ve been able to acquire much useful information, and “meet” interesting writers and experts, all while keeping in shape. Multi-tasking at its best, and so much more enjoyable and inspiring than the news. If you think I should know what’s going on in the world, let me assure you that I do. News is in the very air we breathe.

There are lots of podcasts available, on a variety of subjects. Just do a search and you’ll find more than enough choices. Here’s a good resource.

Do you listen to podcasts? Any favorites to recommend?

Christmas Stories

By Gayle Bartos-Pool (G.B. Pool)

Ideas for stories come from everywhere whether it’s a person, a memory, a trip, a news article, an object or a picture. Something triggers a writer’s imagination and a story starts to form. Every short story or novel I ever wrote came from something I came across in my life. My three Christmas novels are no exception.

Bearnard’s Christmas was the first one. Many years ago I worked at a miniature store in California. It was one of the first of its kind in the country and the owner had a great store. She also had a holiday shop in a backroom off the open patio. We did Easter, Halloween, and most of all, Christmas. I could buy Santas for my budding collection wholesale which helped my bank account, but we also went to the Rose Bowl in Pasadena when they had their monthly swap meet. I could get Santas for $.50 to $1.00 way back then.

But Kay Kelley also had Christmas cards. I remember seeing one with a Polar bear in a Santa hat. Bing! That got me thinking about a story about this Polar bear who helps Santa and a lady who just happened to collect dollhouses who ends up at the North Pole one Christmas Eve and helps both Santa and Bearnard, the Polar bear.

Now, on my salary, I couldn’t afford to buy a dollhouse, much less a castle, but I could sketch one out that fit my story. Then I started writing that story. A few years later the shop closed and I had to find another job, but I finally found a new one that paid more in salary and I also met and married my wonderful husband, Richard. Within a few years I could buy a dollhouse kit or two, but my story was about a castle.

By then, I had written my story, but I figured I should build the castle to go with it. I did. And I fashioned the characters in the story out of clay and took pictures of everything for my book. Eventually I got the book published.

Then I saw this Christmas card with a mechanical Santa. Bing! Another idea popped into my head. What if Santa had mechanical likenesses of himself made that could be sent around to stores so his favorite stories could be told to children in his own voice? Santa has his elves make a few mechanical Santas, but a bad guy has them reprogrammed to tell kids to demand more and more toys. What is Santa to do? The Santa Claus Machine tells that story.

A few years later I happened to find this dragon ornament at the hardware store. He was just a little guy, but cute. While I was walking one of our dogs one day, I happened to spot one of those stretchy things girls use for their ponytails on the sidewalk. It was sparkly and just fit around the little dragon’s neck like a Christmas wreath. I slipped it on him and then took him upstairs where the Santa Castle was sitting. I placed the dragon on the roof and said: “Every Castle Needs a Dragon.” Bing! Guess what the name of the third book is?

A Christmas card or two, an ornament, and some imagination provided me with three story ideas and three books. Ideas do come from those things. But there is another holiday story that I wrote that had its own origin.

After the miniature store closed, I got a job at two stores in the Glendale Galleria before I got the better job at a bank. First, it was in a card store and then a bookstore. Both had their moments, but at the mall during the holidays, they had a Santa Claus. We’ve all seen them at stores as we were growing up. Well this guy was a neat Santa, but when kids weren’t around he sang. He had a microphone and he would entertain us with all kinds of songs. Bing!

I moved my singing Santa to Las Vegas where he started out as a lounge singer in really small places, but his agent, just an employment agency guy, gets him a job as a Santa in a mall during the holidays. He meets this little girl with an illness who needs some help and this Santa has to decide between his career and this kid. A few things pop up to let him know what life is all about and he makes his decision. This book is called The Santa Claus Singer.

(All books are available on Amazon.)

So ideas come from everywhere. It just depends on what you do with those ideas that determines if you get a story out of it. Write On!

Promotion

by Linda O. Johnston

It’s November. A special month for me. I have two new books being published this month. Yes, two. My sixtieth and sixty-first traditionally published novels.

I’m delighted, of course, but still want to do more.

Meantime, I am now in the middle of promoting those books. What are they?

One of them is CRY WOLF, the second Alaska Untamed Mystery that I’m writing for Crooked Lane Books under my first pseudonym, Lark O. Jensen. I’m going to let the world know about it in a variety of ways, including additional blogs and a chat at Writerspace. I’m being interviewed by some people online. And I’m doing a Great Escapes Blog Tour, also online.

The other is CSI COLTON AND THE WITNESS, a Harlequin Romantic Suspense book in their vast series about the large Colton family. Because it’s a series with a large following in itself, and this story is the eleventh in this year’s miniseries, The Coltons of New York, I’m mentioning it a lot but not doing as much promotion for it.

So what do writers do when they want the world to know about their stories? They get out there and tell people in whatever way makes sense!

I’ve been doing this for a long time and have tried many ways of blaring my books out to anyone who’ll listen, including being on panels at conferences, giving talks at chapters of local writers’ organizations, whatever I can find. I’m doing a blog tour and have done several before. I’m volunteering to write articles for various publications.

Do they help? Who knows? I do sell books, but I’ve not had a bestseller. Not yet. But I’m working on it—and the promotions surely don’t hurt.

So what do you do when you have a book published? How do you publicize it? I’d be delighted to hear new ways of doing it, and the other writers who read this would most likely enjoy hearing it too. What works best for you?

And even if you’re not a writer, what kind of publicity do you like to see best from writers?

Let’s get out there!

A NOVEMBER TO REMEMBER…

By Rosemary Lord

“Remember, remember the 5^th of November,

With gunpowder treason and plot.

I see no reason why gunpowder treason,

Should ever be forgot.”

So begins the English children’s rhyme. Back in 1605, when Frenchman Guy de Fawkes tried to blow up the Houses of Parliament, his plot was discovered, and he was stopped. And each November since, the Brits celebrate their victory with ‘Guy Fawkes Night’ or ‘Bonfire Night.’ The children make a ‘guy’ – a dressed-up scarecrow figure that looks like Guy Fawkes. They take their effigies around the streets (usually in a cart or pram) asking for “A penny for the guy!” collecting money to buy fireworks.

The evening festivities include huge bonfires, in your own garden or in community squares, with informal fireworks displays, chestnuts and potatoes roasted on the fires and hot cocoa to drink. A fun winter evening for all ages.

November is a busy month.

The Hindu celebration, Diwali: The Festival of Lights, is November 12^th this year. It is a Hindu new year celebration to say goodbye to the negative and welcome the positive for the year to come. It is a five-day celebration of the triumph of light over darkness, where candles and lights abound, children with sparklers, music and dance (Bollywood style) delicious food and henna tattoos.

A more somber but very heartfelt event is Remembrance Day in England on November 11^th.

It commemorates the Armistice of 1918, signaling the end of the First World War. In England, Australia, and Canada – the Commonwealth countries – people wear a red poppy in respect. At 11 am – the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month, at the Cenotaph in London, the guns fire a salute, broadcast throughout the countries, followed by two minutes silence. The buses, trains and traffic stop. The River Thames and various spots like Trafalgar Square are covered in red poppies in the tribute to the men and women who served in military and civilian service in World War I, World War II and later conflicts. The poppies are a reminder of the red poppies that grew in Flanders Field where so many perished and are buried.

In America, November 11^th is Veteran’s Day: a time to thank and pay tribute to all the men and women who have served or are serving in the military. A grateful nation decorates their homes and gardens with the American flags, and as they pay homage to the veterans, they celebrate with barbeques and patriotic concerts. Coffee shops, restaurants, shops, pay homage to the veterans with welcome signs in the windows and gifts and special discounts. Flags are proudly displayed everywhere. It is a National Holiday.

So, with all this pageantry and celebration going on you might ask, what has this to do with writing? Well – for me, it’s the inspiration. As a historian and writer, I just love to write about these amazing points in history. I think the human angle to these great events gives us rich sources of personal encounters, heroic actions, missed opportunities for mayhem and miracles. Finding a personal account of someone who was there, an eyewitness. I like the idea of using actual historic events and traditions as a backdrop. And when we delve into the real-life stories, we uncover real people; from the big heroes to the ordinary folk just trying to survive the challenges of everyday life. We discover fascinating tidbits of human nature that raise our stories to make something very special.

And November ushers in the winter months, when we turn our clocks back, the days are desperately shortened, with darker mornings and a chill spreads around us. (Unless you’re living in Australia, of course). We dig out that cozy, thick wool sweater, heavyweight sweatpants, fuzzy slippers and we’re ready to sit at our computers with a mug of something hot. The empty page beckons and away we go: off to write another best-seller!

Every November I promise myself that in these ensuing long, dark evenings I will get a lot more writing completed.

And the winter season presents even more back-drops for our mysteries, romances, horror stories or science fiction. Holiday themed novels are always popular. Christmas stories are especially fun to write and popular – except you’re not allowed to call them Christmas stories anymore. So, that’s a fun writer-challenge: how to write about Christmas without using the word Christmas! But I digress…

Another really good challenge for some of us during the winter months is… decluttering the computer files. I didn’t say it was fun challenge, did I? But it is surprisingly therapeutic.

I discovered this need, after spending almost an hour trying to find a file I had just been working on. You see, I couldn’t remember exactly what I had labelled it. If you add a ‘the’ or start with a date, you have to know where to search. (Sometimes, learning Greek seems easier than mastering computers!)

In this quest I discovered dozens of files in a foolishly labelled folder “Assorted writing.” Lesson #1: NEVER file anything under “Assorted” or “Miscellaneous”.

That was another file: “Miscellaneous” with ‘2022’ added for supposed clarity! Didn’t help. I learned the hard way.

Despite the fact that my hunt for my file was lengthy and tedious, I discovered a few gems of old, forgotten, partially written tales and story ideas. Hmmm.

And so I resolved to declutter (there’s that word again!) my files and create a comprehensive labeling and filing system. One that I could remember! A Herculean task, I realize. But one that I can work on during the long, dark, winter evenings.

It’s either that – or I’m diving back under the duvet –and reading my kindle in the dark, where no one can find me!

What’s your plan for the winter months ahead?

Making Your Words Count

I went to a gathering of local writers from Devon and Cornwall last week. Although I have been living back in the UK for five years, I have been a bit of a recluse. A lot had to do with Covid and the self-enforced isolation that seemed not only to curb my freedom, but my confidence too. It’s only now that I am slowly putting out feelers and making new writer friends.

Anyway, about twenty of us met in a lovely restaurant in Exeter and I found I was sitting next to a writer who epitomizes the word “prolific.” I won’t list the number of books of all genres (from Sci-Fi to Romance and non-fiction to ghost writing), that she churns out annually but what stopped me in my tracks (actually, I almost choked on my Halloumi fries) was her goal to write HALF A MILLION WORDS a year. And she casually said she usually comes close.

My first thought was that she had to be a robot. My second, maybe she uses ChatGPT, or maybe she’s a “first line writer.” I use that phrase because my former husband wrote for a TV show and was once accused of being a “first line writer” which upset him greatly. For those unfamiliar with the term, it’s an insult literally saying, “writing the first thing that comes to mind.” I did ask my new writer friend (who was also very nice which made it hard to dislike her) her process. Was she a Pantzer? Did rewriting, editing, and proofreading count towards the magic 500,000 words but nope, I was assured her words were all brand new.

So what’s wrong with me? If I’m lucky, on a good day, I could write nine hundred new words. I’ll probably go back and rewrite them a few times. My books under contract ask for 70,000 to 75,000 words (relatively small if you are used to 80,000 and above). Once, I wrote two books in one year so that topped at 140,000. I never used to be obsessed with my word count until that lunch.

To make myself feel better, I did a bit of research. In my defence, I still have a full-time job, a sick mother, two demanding dogs and – fanfare of trumpets – I’ve just become a grandmother for the first time … so I’m a little busy.

Even so – here are a few famous authors and their daily word counts.

Tom Wolfe: 135 words. As you can imagine, each book takes a very long time to write.
Ernest Hemingway: 500.
Graham Greene: 500. He said that when he has written his 500 words, he stops – even if it’s in the middle of a scene.
Ian McEwan: 600.
W. Somerset Maugham: 1,000. Maugham said there was no set formula on writing. “There are three rules for writing a novel,” he said. “Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.”
Peter James: 1,000. Once you start writing a book, make time to write every single day. Find a comfortable number of words for you to write each day and stick to that number. I am comfortable with 1000 words.
Margaret Attwood: 1,000-2,000.
Mark Twain: 1,400 to 1,800. Twain believed that location was important to his word count. I write very well on transatlantic flights, so I think he has a point.
Lee Child: 1,800. He says it takes him about six months from the first blank screen until the end.
Stephen King: 2,000. As a side note, if you haven’t read his book On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft, or you haven’t read it for a while, it’s worth revisiting. Stephen says that following this would add up to about 180,000 words in three months … well on track for the annual 500,000 goal but what about rewriting? Speaking of Ernest Hemingway, he famously said that “All writing is rewriting.”
Nicholas Sparks: 2,000. He says his is a daily goal which takes him about five or six hours to write.
Anne Rice: 3,000.
Arthur Conan Doyle: 3,000.
Michael Crichton: 10,000. Okay, this one got my attention. He’s up there with my new writer friend.

POSTSCRIPT: Okay … yesterday I was part of an event at the Torquay Museum called Crime at the Coast – sitting next to me was another prolific author who writes four, 70,000-word cozies a year, screenplays for her TV job and a standalone. I didn’t have the courage to ask her if she topped half a million words a year but one thing is certain, I’m just desperately slow.

So … what about you? Do you write to a daily word count?

SHADOWS OF THE PAST

by Miko Johnston

My first book, A Petal in the Wind, begins a family saga that encompasses a half century. As each subsequent entry in the series carries a subtitle, my fifth and last book, which I’m writing now, will be called Shadows of the Past.

That phrase took on new meaning recently when my husband Allan and I traveled to Europe.

Our trip began in Prague, where much of my series takes place. I spent a day walking in the footsteps of my characters, visiting their homes, businesses and the landmarks mentioned throughout the pages. I’d selected most of the locations on Google Maps, so seeing them for real was, shall we say, enlightening. It took an hour to find U Seminaire, the location of the bachelor pad I’d used for the man who eventually marries my protagonist, Lala. I’d chosen it because it seemed like a quick walk from the Charles Bridge. In actuality it sits underneath the bridge, entangled in a labyrinth of short blocks and alleys. Somehow the building’s image got reversed on Maps – it’s on the opposite side of the street. Ouch. The little greenbelt across from Lala’s mother’s apartment, where ladies sat on benches underneath the shade trees and gossiped, actually sits below street level, though trees do line the sidewalk and there are benches. And the “gentle slope” of the street where Lala’s family lived for twenty years turned out to be a heart-pounding climb on a good day, and treacherous during inclement weather. Sigh. Still, as I stood in front of the building, seeing it for real, I felt thrilled.

In my fourth book, Lala launches her design career by converting a series of buildings into a world-class hotel. Ironically, the palace (the Czech term for a fine home), which I’d chosen for the location is now an actual hotel, and we decided to book it for our visit. It turned out the be the finest hotel I’ve ever stayed in, and although I have no right to take pride in that, I can’t help but feel delighted. On a slow afternoon I cornered the hotel staff and peppered them with questions about the building’s history, particularly during the Second World War. What began as a brief history lesson turned out to be a wild series of stories and gossip, which will inevitably solve some plot issues.

Three days later Allan and I bid ahoj to Prague and boarded a train bound for Poland. After an overnight stop in Katowice, the largest city in the region known as Upper Silesia, we took a cab to the nearby city of Bytom, the hometown of my father and his entire family. Back then Upper Silesia was part of Germany, the city known as Beuthen. As I walked along the streets, I tried to picture what his life must have been like. I gazed at the people who passed, wondering if I’d see any signs of familiarity in their faces.

The picturesque parts of the town – with some remarkable architecture and a delightful town square, partially rebuilt after being bombed in WWII – surprised me, but other areas wore the hard reality of over a half-century of decline. I saw it in the run-down buildings left to rot and the pervasive trash, especially cigarette butts, in the street. I also saw it in the faces and the body language of so many, but most strikingly in the older folks, who’d lived through Nazi occupation, followed by decades of Soviet rule, only to be largely ignored by the European Union. They bore a sense of quiet despair, of resignation to the bleakness in their existence. The only signs of joy were in little children interacting with pigeons in the town square, swarming with them, chasing them or karate-kicking them away. I saw no faces that resembled mine, nor any signs of my past in the city. It had been wiped clean.

Our next stop in Poland was Krakow, a city Allan has always wanted to visit. Rich in history, it has a beautiful castle on a hill overlooking the Vistula River, and the largest town square in Europe. I went for a different reason. On our second day there we boarded a bus to tour the two largest and most infamous Nazi-era concentration camps, Auschwitz and Birkenau.

Entering into the first camp, with its ARBEIT MACHT FREI (“Work sets you free”) sign over the entrance gate, I wondered how I would react, or feel. I’m still not sure, to be honest, other than the eerie familiarity of what I heard and saw – from decades of studying photographs accompanied by written accounts, of documentaries and movies filmed on location, and stories I’d heard from survivors, including my father. For many, the trip was a history lesson. For me, it was akin to visiting the cemetery; I lost an estimated ninety members of my family there.

After a brief break, the tour continued to nearby Birkenau. Unlike Auschwitz, which to me felt small and claustrophobic, Birkenau is huge. You’ve seen it in many movies: a long low building with railroad tracks leading to a central tower, open at the bottom to allow trains to enter with their human cargo, like a gaping maw ready to devour all who arrive. Alongside and beyond the entrance, what seems like miles and miles of barbed wire fencing surrounds a huge open area interspersed with low barracks and guard towers. In the distance I could see different tour groups traversing the grounds, and for one brief moment I pictured them in the striped uniforms and hats of prisoners.

Prior to abandoning the camp in January 1945, days ahead of the advancing Russian forces, the Nazis burned the meticulous records they’d kept of all who were brought to the camps and blew up the gas chambers. Only piles of rubble remain. Many, many piles. They left behind the prisoners too weak to continue; the rest (including my father) went on a forced march from one concentration camp to the next, always trying to stay ahead of the Russians, whom they rightfully feared more than the other Allies. It took several more months until my father was liberated, but at least the Americans freed him. Had he stayed behind in Auschwitz, he would have lived the rest of his life under the thumb of the Soviets. After what I saw in Bytom, I’m grateful he had the strength to wait.

The entire tour took seven hours and, although it allowed for a few bathroom breaks, it did not include a meal. The irony was not lost on me.

We left Poland and continued our travels, with France the next destination. There I stumbled upon traces of history that will influence my writing, and my life, but I’ll save that for a future post.

I can’t say these experiences will enrich the final chapter in my saga, but I can say I truly feel as though I’ve walked in the shadows of the past, both my characters’, and mine.

Miko Johnston, a founding member of The Writers in Residence, is the author of the historical fiction series, “A Petal in the Wind”, as well as a contributor to several anthologies including the about-t0-be-released “Whidbey Island: An Insider’s Guide”. Miko lives in Washington (the big one) with her rocket scientist husband. Contact her at mikojohnstonauthor@gmail.com